Thursday, January 27, 2011

Practicing Forgiveness and the Acceptance of the unknowable

As promised, each week we host a guest blogger. I am so excited to share the amazing insights from Yoga Instructor, owner- Stacy Renz. Stacy is an amazing force in our community and her own blog is inspiring others. I wanted to share with you: Day 141....

My Journey to Ease Day 141 – Accepting the Unknowable

by Stacy Renz

Yesterday something completely bizarre happened. My husband came home around 5pm and asked me if I knew why Orange Kitty was sitting outside on the roof! Luckily we were able to safely retrieve Orange Kitty from a window sill. Upon investigation Greg discovered he had left an attic window open when he had taken down some of the Christmas lights. He knew Orange Kitty had gone out this way because the remaining lights were askew as if Orange Kitty had swung down on them to the roof below like Tarzan! But here is the bizarre part. The attic door was shut tight and I had not gone up there at all yesterday. How did he get into the attic? Had Greg gone up there the night before? I swear Orange Kitty had been present and accounted for before bed. Weird.

And then we discovered that our feral kitty Mouse was also missing. Was he outside? Was he in the attic? Food left on the porch last night was eaten but was it by Mouse, a stray cat, or even a raccoon? Well, about 12:45 last night I began to hear Mouse's pathetic cries. In a stupor I got up and strained to hear where it was coming from – as soon as I got up of course he stopped. So I went downstairs and looked out both doors knowing this was probably futile since he runs at the sight of us. As predicted, I did not see him. So as soon as I was nearly asleep again I heard the cries. They were so close I knew they had to be coming from the attic. So I stumbled to shut the bedroom door and open the attic door so mouse could come out of the attic but the other cats could not get into the attic. Just as I was getting back to sleep, Mouse cried again – to get out of the bedroom. So I got up, shut the attic door, and opened the bedroom door. Would I be able to get back to sleep after all this? It was now 1:30. Thankfully I was able to fall asleep again knowing all my cat children were safely back in the house. Sigh. I am still full of puzzlement at how the cats got into the attic. Shortly before Greg discovered Orange Kitty I had seen Mouse go out onto the front porch. I may never know what really happened.

This is not the first bizarre event to occur in our home. A few years ago Greg came home to find the glass door of our china cupboard complete shattered outward as if something had exploded inside the cupboard. Nothing else was disturbed except for the glass in million tiny pieces all over the floor. We never figured this one out either.

So what is the moral of this story and how does it relate to ease (you might be asking)? Sometimes we can get very hung up on figuring out the why of things. Nothing is inherently wrong with that – Knowing the why and the how can help us prevent similar situations in the future. However, when the answer is unclear or unknowable at the time, we must allow ourselves to move on anyway. An example might be trying to understand why someone we thought was a friend suddenly leaves the friendship and will not tell us why or trying to understand why our parents acted with such apparent disregard for our mental or even physical health when we were growing up. We can remain stuck sometimes for years if we do not get the answers we seek. What I have found is that practicing acceptance of the unknowable and forgiveness (with the appropriate amount of emotional boundary setting) toward the "perpetrator" often allows the truth to be revealed in right timing. And in the meantime, I have kept on living and growing in my own right – perhaps to the point that I can actually receive the truth with grace.

In the cases of the Mysterious Escaping Kitties and the Mysterious Shattering Cupboard, I may discover a secret passageway to the attic or that a spirit resides with us in the house, opening attic doors and shattering glass. If it is the latter I might prefer it remains unknowable.

To learn more about Stacy and her Yoga studio: Living Room Yoga visit:

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